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Can you cook?”“Yes!” I replied, “Quite well actually. I went on a 3-month cookery course when I left school.”“Good,” replied my lover. “Then you can come back here this afternoon and prepare supper. Then we will have an early night – no sex for either of us. I got a text last night from Tim and we have both been selected for the match against North Island tomorrow – make sure that Tim fits you out with the correct rugby kit – you are playing No .12 – outside centre. Come on lover, you can come and wash me as you have so splendidly fucked me!”Once we had washed and dried each other, Mai-Sung led me along the corridor to another bedroom. “This is your room, darling – you need your own space. I hope you will want to sleep with me most of the time, but I want it clearly understood that you are welcome to have your own lovers here of either sex and you will need your own space to entertain them. And don’t worry about my proclivities – if you want cock rather than cunt, then that is. .. like me. I did it twice. My father used to say, "You fool me once? Shame on you! You fool me twice? Shame on me!" He said that a lot.Supposing one did get married ... like my first time.The number two cause is the reception.That's when you meet the child molesters and porn stars, my newly acquired brother in law. Not my wife's brother ... no ... her sister's husband. He happened to be both. Molester AND porn star ... which brings us to the funny uncle.I'd rather not talk about that.The crazy aunts; in this case they're my sisters in law. Bat shit crazy ... all four of them ... but the youngest one decided I should be married to her ... and she was truly cute. Even though I no longer have the first wife ... they are still my children's aunts.I am beginning to see that the next category is redundant; the perverts and the preverts.I met the borrowers and the beggars. One borrower wanted the money he gave us for our wedding gift back ... but don't tell his wife because it was the rent.
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