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I feel comfortable talking to you about it.”“Then I guess I could see doing that with someone I was close to, but not in love with, if they felt the same way. And I think that’s the bottom line - if both people want to do it, and both feel the same way about each other, then I don’t think it’s wrong. I agree with you about the wedding night thing, but I know other people who don’t.”“My dad!” she said.“My parents, my priest, and a bunch of other people, too! But it has to be up to the person. I can’t think of a more personal, intimate decision than that. Can you?”“No. It’s kind of scary when you think about it.”I nodded, “I know. Honesty, right?”“Yes.”“I WANT to do it. I really do. In fact, I’ve tried to get someone to do it. But that didn’t mean I wasn’t scared. Heck, even TALKING about it with you makes me nervous.”“When I teased you before, I felt weird. Kind of tingly like when you kiss me, but I also felt really scared. Do you think everyone feels that way?”“The first time? Maybe. Now it's stillnothing to brag about but I notice that I'm not getting as many staresfrom the guys in the showers at gym class. And when I go to jerk off Ican now get my whole hand around it. Plus, I don't have to worry aboutstuffing a sock into my underwear to fill it out.Maybe masturbating really did cause it to get bigger. I'll have to workon that more often. HA!Erin and I were in the food court at the mall a couple of days ago whenshe looked over at me and said, "You know Danny, there's something aboutyou these days that's different. I'm not sure what it is but you're,like, well, more confident or something." Yeah? Maybe it's because I'm glad not to be a Freshman anymore." That could be it. But I think there's more to it than that. Whatever itis, you wear it well." I almost choked at that point - I was almostgoing to say that I wasn't "wearing it", it was hanging between my legs- but that probably wouldn't have been taken too well.Things continued to "improve" during my sophomore.
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