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“Well, let me have them,” she said, grinning. I handed over the bag.“Go upstairs and try them on with something sexy,” I suggested. “Might as well make sure they’re the right pair for you.”She rolled her eyes and smiled. “Come up in about fifteen minutes,” she said. Again I started the timer on my cell phone as she headed up.That was the longest fifteen minutes of my life. But again, I was determined not to be early. I waited until the timer went off, then I waited for what seemed like another ten minutes, although it was probably thirty seconds. It was time to go upstairs.The master bedroom door was closed. I opened it slowly. There she was, in bed, with the comforter pulled up over her. She was grinning evilly. I walked up, thinking that if she was still in her jeans and a sweater I would have to get a little nasty. I pulled the comforter back dramatically and was blown away. She was wearing a tight leather underbust corset, black fully fashioned nylons, and the. A lady goes to the bar on a cruise ship and orders a Scotch with two drops of water. As the bartender gives her the drink she says,"I'm on this cruise to celebrate my 80th birthday and it's today..."The bartender says, "Well, since it's your birthday, I'll buy you a drink. In fact, this one is on me."As the woman finishes her drink, the woman to her right says, "I would like to buy you a drink, too."The old woman says, "Thank you. Bartender, I want a Scotch with two drops of water." Coming up," says the bartender.As she finishes that drink, the man to her left says, "I would like to buy you one, too."The old woman says, "Thank you. Bartender, I want another Scotch with two drops of water." Coming right up," the bartender says.As he gives her the drink, he says, "Ma'am, I'm dying of curiosity. Why the Scotch with only two drops of water?"The old woman replies,"Sonny, when you're my age, you've learned how to hold your liquor. Holding your water, however, is a whole other issue." OLD".
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