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Survivors guilt they called it, also with a happy helping of PTSD. I spent time trying to control my emotions and keep the memories away, but nothing worked. I've just accepted that they will come and go as they please, so that's how I live. I hope I haven't scared you away."She took my hands in hers, looked at me with those wonderful eyes and gave me a kiss. It wasn't a pitty kiss or a 'this might make you feel better' kiss, it was a passionate kiss. After the first few seconds the initial shock wore off and I kissed her back. When she finally broke the kiss she looked at me."Have you ever told that story before?" No, well.. not to anyone who wasn't trying to treat me. Carl doesn't even know what happened." So why tell me first?"It was a question I had expected. I guess after spilling about the incident, everything else would be easy."Because of how you look at me, it makes me feel comfortable and safe. I don't have to prove anything to you or act like a hero."She looked. She dropped off of the barstool and took her drink in hand. As she crossed the room and approached his table he looked up at her with a friendly smile.She asked, “Care to have some company? Or are you waiting for someone?”“I’m waiting on no one,” he told her.“May I sit?”“Of course.”She pulled out the chair and sat down, showing a bright flash of leg as she did so.“What has you drinking alone in the hotel bar?” she asked him.“Business trip.”“Are you by yourself?”“Yes.”She took a tiny ferocious bite of olive. “Is that why you are drinking here alone in the hotel bar?”“Yes.”“I might have guessed.”“So what has you drinking alone in the hotel bar?” he asked. “On a business trip too?”“No. I just like the bar. Nice music. Good gin. A friendly bartender.” She turned and waved to the bartender. He returned the wave. “I live in town.”“It’s a nice town.” She snapped at another olive.“It’s okay.” She brushed away the subject with her hand. “You’re married.” She nodded to his ring.“Yes.” He took.
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