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Have another glass of wine. I looked at theclock. It was almost 11:00pm. Where did the time go? I started thinking thatmaybe a lot of people in the building went way for the long weekend. It didseen unusually quiet in the halls. I looked out my peep hole in my door anddidn't see or hear anything. I decided to go for it. I opened my door slowlyand proceeded down the hall to the laundry room. I quickly got my stuff outof the dryer and put it in my laundry basket and walked back to my apartmenttrying to walk softly so my heels wouldn't click so loudly on the woodenfloor of the hallway. I opened my apartment door and slipped in and closedthe door behind me. Whew! I made it. My heart was pounding and I thought tomyself that was pretty exciting!I was so relieved. Right up until there was a very loud pounding on mydoor. I was so scared. I looked through my peep hole and it was Josh, myneighbor from across the hall. Josh was about 35, divorced and had a roommate. He was kind of nerdy but. You really had to wonder how the hell he did it for so long.Four seperate girls all at the same time within a three year time span. None of them even found out until after he died, when they all met up pregnant during the funeral.Amazing how the bastard worked. You wished you had the same luck with women. Maybe not the same luck that got him killed though.It was the strangest thing, really. One night after he was fucking your biological mother, shooting fifty CC's of baby batter into her stomach that would eventually form the compounds that would give you life in this earth, he used his zippo to light two 100 dollar bills, which he then used to light his cigar. Your mother woke up from what you can only assume was the best sex she ever had in her entire life and asked him to marry her.Your father, being the paragon of virtue that he was, politely declined the offer.'Politely declining' in this case meant that he decided to jump out the window in an effort to not be roped into a.
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