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He said he just wanted to talk about what had happened the last time, so I invited him in for a drink and to talk, just talk, really that was the only reason I let him through the door. I shouldn't have, maybe we could have recovered what we had. That was the first night I let him do me at home, when first soiled our marital bed.When he left I cried myself to sleep.The next time you were away, the same happened, the time after that was when he took my last virginity.I would like to say I wished it was you but by then I was hooked, at the time I was glad he had me there first, it was only when you took it by force did I begin to see it was you that should have been using me like he did. That the only reason you had not used me like a whore was because you loved me, you respected me and you treated me as an equal.Now as I face my lust, my lack of respect and the fact I treated you like a pet I realise I couldn't have any more regrets about what I had been doing with him.I am sorry my. She glanced at the clock on the cable box. It was almost 1. If she'd allowed herself to be hopeful, she would have been disappointed. She closed her laptop and put it on the desk, pulled the clip out of her hair, and shut the lights off. She sat against the headboard of the bed, finishing her drink, and found some bad horror movie on one of the cable channels. It was sort of a relief, she thought, that he didn't show up. She'd have been a nervous wreck. She'd have to deal with the guessing games and try to figure out what he was thinking and feeling while beating herself up for what she felt. Instead, she had the quiet night to herself, just enjoying the peace. She'd just finished her drink and was about to start getting ready for bed when she heard the key in the door. It was 1:30. She'd given him the key at 9. If she had any sort of self respect, she'd put the deadbolt on. But she didn't. Not when it came to him. The irony was that she knew he'd be strangely impressed if she did.
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