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I want to make him happy, I really do. It’s just when he was punishing me he seemed to change and it scared me more than I’ve ever been scared before. I don’t know for sure but I got the feeling he scared himself. If I could just figure out what he wanted from me I would do anything to avoid putting him in that position again.’ I read her thoughts and found that she actually feared for her life. By the time I’d delivered the last stroke she was convince I was going to kill her. Knowing this just brought back my own depression at having failed. ‘Savannah, I know Kenny loves you and he truly doesn’t want to hurt you. He’d kill me if he knew I was telling you this but after your session today he called me. He was really upset with himself for having gone so far. He asked me to take special care of you and was really worried about you. Remember, as new as this is to you it is new to him as well. He’s really trying to find his own sense of balance and if you can just help him a bit I know. He told his wife they would seek a second opinion. If that opinion was the same, then they would seek a third and a fourth. No matter how many doctors it would take, they would find someone with the courage to deliver a more optimistic diagnosis. ‘Bill, I love you,’ Emily said, smiling sweetly. ‘But honey, you need to face the truth. This is happening, and there is nothing you or I can do to stop it.’ ‘Bullshit,’ he said. He could feel the anger bubbling toward the surface. ‘Honey…I’m so sorry to put you through this.’ He looked at her with amazement. Here she was going through this incomprehensible moment, staring into the darkened depths of her own mortality, and her main concern was with him. Over the next several months, he would continue to be amazed at the strength and character of this woman. Together, they decided that she would undergo chemotherapy treatment in order to prolong her life as much as possible. Bill was never much of a caregiver, and avoided being near sick.
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