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Damn, I wanted a drink suddenly. I felt edgy. No, I felt the desire for a drink, and I fought it off, but I could feel it hanging around the edge of my lips, trickling down into my chest. ‘Let’s get out of here,’ I said. ‘I knew you wouldn’t enjoy it.’ ‘Not your fault,’ I said. ‘Come on. Let’s get out of here.’ I stood up. ‘I want a drink. Badly. Maybe I won’t if we get out of here.’ We drove across town. It was dark and chilly. I turned on the heater. We passed a park. It was dark and out of the streetlights. I parked beside the curb. I turned and looked at her. ‘Look,’ I said. ‘I like you a hell of a lot. Maybe I can help you.’ She laughed. ‘Oh, God, you can do better than that.’ ‘I’m not kidding.’ I clenched both fists tightly. I thought of a massage girl in Thailand. She had taught me a lot. I counted to five. I unclenched my fists and. stretched my fingers wide. ‘What’re you doing?’ ‘Take it easy,’ I said. ‘Nobody’s going to make a pass at you.’ I shook my hands rapidly back and. It referred tothis pervert's compulsion to play with the genitals of little boys.She appeared genuinely shaken by his statement. That touched him. Heappreciated sympathy, but not pity. He held her arm to steady her as shetook a seat at the table."Suicide is an awful thing," she said. "Especially for the parents, likeyou." They say that he was depressed for a number of reasons, but I put itdown to that degenerate," he said. My son became confused, you see. Hewas always very sensitive. This predator took advantage of an innocentchild." The 'Fiddler Boy' was quite young himself," she observed. "All youngpeople suffer from confusion of a kind. It just manifests in differentways." Are you defending him?" Not at all. There were victims. Many victims. People suffered. Theperson who brings about that kind of suffering deserves to be punishedand treated if that is possible."It occurred to him that this woman must know this monster. It certainlyappeared that way. But he stopped.
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